Do you t alk about your dieting and weight loss goals with your fat friends? Have you asked for their consent , or how it impacts them to hear everything you may be doing to avoid looking like them?
Do you interrupt anti-fat bias when you see it, or do you let it slide, instead prioritizing your own comfort, or believing that anti-fatness is a natural consequence of daring to be fat? Have you spoken out against it, both for fat colleagues and colleagues with eating disorders?
Do you shop at stores that also carry plus and extended plus sizes, supporting the designers and retailers that fat people need so desperately? Have you assessed and addressed your own anti-fat bias? Have you read books that are written both by and about fat people? Have you looked critically at the anti-fat myths that you may still believe? Have you done the research and the self-work to uproot the parts of you that still want to pathologize, pity, or condescend to fat people? It can be painful to watch a loved one denigrate themselves.
For many fat people, anti-fatness is a learned behavior, and one that is often required of us by the world around us. In order to access health care, we often have to disavow our own bodies, insisting that we will shed them as quickly as we can. These good intentions may come across as criticism. Some teens who are overweight are teased or bullied.
Teasing and bullying can make you feel sad or embarrassed. Fear of being judged or rejected might make you shy away from people. You may stop doing things you enjoy.
But the best thing to do is to take your mind — and other people's — off your weight and back onto you as a person. Remember that everyone feels shy when stepping into a new situation, even people who seem really confident. You may want to ask a friend to join you when trying new activities. But what about when friends and family aren't giving you the support you need? If you feel pressured or misunderstood by friends or family, tell them how you feel.
For example, tell them it doesn't help when they call you out when you slip up. Let people know what you appreciate such as praise when you do well and what you don't like such as comments about weight or lecturing about food or exercise. Some people who are overweight have very good self-esteem. They're able to focus on their accomplishments and take pride in themselves.
But some people who struggle with their weight also struggle with low self-esteem — especially when other people can be so unkind. When we have negative thoughts and feelings about our bodies , these feelings may overflow into other areas of life. Negative thoughts can affect a person's confidence and make it difficult to accomplish goals. For example, someone who thinks "I can't do this" or "Why bother, I'll always be overweight" may have a harder time losing weight.
This is one reason why it's important to recognize any negative emotions and work hard to change them. The amount of time it takes to lose weight, and the natural tendency to slip up occasionally, can leave people feeling discouraged and disappointed.
This can lead to self-criticism, anger, or even guilt about letting friends or family down. Sometimes, difficult feelings — and constant worry over weight — make a person eat more. But there is a way to break the cycle and build healthier self-esteem. Start by loving yourself. If you feel tempted to put your body or yourself down, focus instead on your talents and things you do well.
Another great way to boost self-esteem is to accomplish goals that you set for yourself. If you're trying to lose weight, make your goals about changing behaviors, not about losing weight. Set small, realistic goals and then check in regularly to watch your progress. It would mean a life of permanent hunger. And I was physically fit. I decided to set other priorities in my life; I trained as a psychotherapist, got married and started renovating an old house.
At the age of 30, I tipped the scales at kg 23st 8lb. If asked, I told people I was comfortable with my weight and that my only wish, if anything, was to be a bit fitter. But at that same time, I was secretly visiting an obesity clinic as an outpatient and thinking about a stomach-stapling operation.
I eventually decided not to have the operation, and buried myself even deeper in studies that showed that being overweight was not really harmful. My doctor never mentioned my weight. I managed to ignore the fact that I was suffering frequent back pain and that I was having trouble sleeping, in part because of my heavy snoring. This went on until, one day, I slipped while doing housework and injured my knee. I know now that I tore my cruciate ligament; but at the time my doctor said it was probably nothing to worry about and prescribed me ibuprofen.
Then I had another accident while renovating our house. I walked with a limp for months, until it happened again. After more than a year of pain and restricted mobility, I had a breakdown. I realised that, over the previous few years, my health had decreased while my weight had increased. And I knew that if I kept going this way, within a few years I would be unable to walk — while still in my early 30s. Something had to change. For the first time, I consciously started thinking about my eating behaviour and began reading up on genetics, metabolism, diets and obesity.
Although I had read around the topic for a while, I had done so selectively. I have always been the kind of person who questions things; I have a doctorate, and an interest in science.
But still I believed in so much fat logic, probably because I was always surrounded by it. Tearing down the fallacies I had believed for my whole life was a long and sometimes painful process.
But in the following year, I began to put it to practical use. I restricted my calorie intake. I moved more. Within a year, I was in the normal weight range for my cm 5ft 9in height; and a few months later I weighed 63kg 9st 13lb — the least I had weighed since the age of 12 or Fat logic is not just a problem for fat people; I have never met a person who was completely free of it.
Here are a handful of the most persistent myths, debunked. The amount of energy we need is influenced by various factors, but the main ones are body mass, and what that mass is made up of. The only information you need is height, weight, sex and approximate daily activity levels. The bottom line is that most people use far more than 1, kcal a day, but even people with extremely low consumption still need significantly more energy than 1, kcal.
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